Midlife Crisis? 42-Year-Old Cybersecurity Expert Questions Stable Career Path. José, a successful six-figure earner, feels the pull of a midlife crisis but hesitates to risk his financial security. He dreams of trading his computer for a career in exercise science, even considering a move to Southeast Asia. Is it time for a drastic life change, or is financial stability holding him back? Explore the challenges of a midlife crossroads and the question: when is the right time to pursue your passions?
A 42-year-old Dallas-area cybersecurity professional, earning a six-figure salary for two decades, faces a midlife crossroads. Financially secure with his girlfriend, he questions his career path and dreams of a fulfilling second life, possibly involving exercise science or a move to Southeast Asia. His dilemma: balancing the stability of a high-paying job with the desire for a dramatic career change
Midlife Crisis? 42-Year-Old Cybersecurity Expert Yearns for Change. Trading his six-figure salary and stable Dallas life, José dreams of an exercise science degree, a passion for combat sports, and perhaps even a Southeast Asian adventure. Is it time for a career change, or is the risk too great? Read his story and explore the realities of a midlife crisis
Midlife Crisis? 42-Year-Old Cybersecurity Expert Questions Career Change. José, a six-figure earner, feels the pull of a midlife crisis but hesitates to risk his stable career for a passion project. With dreams of exercise science, Southeast Asian adventures, and escaping the daily grind, he grapples with the question: if not now, when? Is it time for a radical career shift, or is financial security worth the sacrifice of pursuing his passions?
Midlife crisis: The stereotypical image—red sports car, a dramatic life overhaul—is familiar to many millennials and Gen Xers. But the reality? Research shows 10-20% of people experience midlife angst in their 40s and 50s, prompting reflection and sometimes, a life restart. Is it time for *your* midlife reset?
Midlife crisis: A catalyst for reinvention? Facing mortality can shift priorities from "deficiency motivations" to "growth motivations," as Harvard Business Review research suggests. This newfound self-awareness unlocks financial freedom and wisdom, empowering a fulfilling life restart
Midlife Crisis: The Dream vs. Reality for Gen X and Millennials. Can financial stability stifle the desire for a life change? Many, like José, dream of a dramatic career shift in their 40s, but the fear of losing a stable income makes it a risky proposition. Is it possible to pursue passions later in life without jeopardizing financial security?
Feeling stuck in a career rut? Many professionals, especially in tech, are facing economic uncertainty and high living costs, making a career change feel impossible. AI advancements and slow hiring rates are adding to the pressure. Is a midlife career pivot a luxury you can't afford? Explore the challenges and realities of changing careers in today's economy, and discover if a fulfilling career shift is within reach
Midlife Crisis: To Quit or Not to Quit? Ten midlifers reveal the surprising truth about pursuing passions later in life. While dreams of radical life changes abound, the realities of financial stability and practical considerations often outweigh the desire for immediate personal fulfillment. Is it ever too late to reinvent yourself?
Feeling Trapped: Is the Real Crisis a Stagnant Economy? Many, like José, are financially secure yet yearn for life change. Discover why a stable job doesn't always equal fulfillment, and explore the challenges of pursuing midlife passions in today's economic climate
Feeling stuck in a midlife rut? Therapist and life coach Francesca Maximé helps clients navigate this common challenge, reframing the "midlife crisis" as a powerful "midlife pivot
From TV Reporter to Thriving Entrepreneur: A 54-Year-Old's Midlife Career Reinvention. After nearly two decades in television news, Maximé, disillusioned by the 2016 election coverage and facing personal challenges, transformed her life. Therapy inspired a career shift, leading her to build two successful businesses. Now, she's thriving as an independent entrepreneur
Midlife anxiety hitting you? Many facing career uncertainty in their 40s and 50s yearn for a life revitalization, but struggle to envision – or dare to dream – a fulfilling next chapter. They seek a career pivot, but economic anxieties and job market unknowns hold them back. Is this you?
Midlife: Knowing Yourself vs. Risking It All. For many in their 40s and 50s, self-awareness peaks, but so does the fear of major life changes. Responsibilities—family, career, finances—make taking risks feel impossible, even when a fulfilling second half of life beckons. Is it a midlife crisis, or simply a crossroads? Learn how to navigate this challenging yet potentially transformative phase of life
Feeling stuck in a midlife rut? Leading psychologist Margie Lachman assures us it's never too late to reassess your life goals and make significant changes. Dissatisfaction in your 40s might simply mean you're clearer about your desires. Embrace this opportunity for a fulfilling second chapter—you don't need all the answers to start creating the life you truly want
But older millennials, in particular, tend to feel like they’ve been casualties of periods of uncertainty that have coincided with key points in their lives. The dot-com bust and the Great Recession hit at the onset of their adulthoods and working lives; the COVID pandemic arrived as they were starting to reach their 40s; and now they’re dealing with inflation and new technology like AI just at the moment when they were supposed to be nearing the heights of their professional lives and earning power. “Everyone experiences these same events, but depending on where you are in the life course, they can have differential effects,” Lachman says.
The sense that now is an especially inopportune moment for midlifers to take a leap of faith is echoed by Gen Xers.
Jane, a marketing professional in Canada, has already had one midlife crisis. She got so much out of it that she’d like to have another.
A decade ago, when she was in her mid-40s, Jane walked away from a career in PR and marketing and spent a few years working on a doctorate in history and traveling with her partner. It was, they thought, their “last chance to have the big adventure.” (Jane also asked that her last name not be used for fear of professional consequences.) But when the COVID pandemic hit in 2020, and the academic path turned out not to be economically viable, Jane returned to the more stable world she’d hoped to leave behind. She took a job in content marketing for a tech company in Canada. “I’ve got, by any standards, a really awesome job with a really awesome company,” says Jane, who’s now 55. “I have no objective reason to feel dissatisfied with this. I should be grateful.”
And yet, the past few years have felt like being on “a treadmill that just keeps going faster and faster and faster, and you’re just burning more energy to just stay in one place,” she says.
She’s desperate to get off that treadmill. She still feels a strong pull to do community work or to train to become a mental health counselor. But she no longer feels confident that a job in her old field will be waiting for her if she finds she can’t earn enough to keep up with the household expenses. She’s already the oldest person in her company, and she expects AI will eventually take over the kind of writing she does anyway. She fears her 30 years of experience could rapidly become worthless.
“I didn’t realize that I would get slammed with being obsolete this early,” she says.
It can be hard to come to terms with wanting to shake things up — to the point of knowing how you’d do it — while realizing that doing so would be irresponsible. But the implications of being caught in a rut are bigger than a slice of the population feeling unable to follow their bliss. “People feeling stuck means that workers are less engaged with their work,” says Daniel Zhao, Glassdoor’s lead economist. “And employee engagement is important to productivity.”
Nearly everyone I interviewed for this story said they felt unsure that the path they were on was sustainable, since new technologies are devaluing skills they’ve spent decades mastering — let alone that it would offer them a lot of personal satisfaction in the long term.
Kara Haas, a 43-year-old living in Brooklyn, feels caught between a shrinking profession and more uncertainty than she can comfortably manage. Years ago, she dreamed of becoming a film director. When that didn’t work out, she thought she’d found a still-great option working as a set designer for TV shows and movies. But smaller budgets and a steep decline in the number of projects getting greenlit have meant there’s a lot less work than there used to be.
Haas feels like this could be her last, best moment to switch to something different. She’s thought about opening an Airbnb. But with less work, she has a smaller cushion to sustain her through a major transition. She worries about falling behind on her expenses or losing the health insurance she gets through her union.
Haas sees only bad options, which is a far cry from how she imagined things turning out. She’d always assumed that her midlife crisis would at least be an opportunity to have some fun. “We should just be buying sports cars and accruing boy toys,” she says. “But I guess we’re doing something else.”
Whatever the state of the job market and the broader economy, millennials are certainly not immune to having a midlife crisis in the classic sense: feeling bogged down by adult responsibilities, like parenting, and regret over not getting to enjoy the fruits of their labor. For millennials especially, this can be exacerbated by other cultural shifts: parents, including dads, are spending far more time with their kids than previous generations; they take less vacation; and just keeping up with your contemporaries is more expensive than ever. By one estimate, the cost of raising a child has gone up 20% since 2016.
“You pass 40-something, and you start to become really aware how much time is left,” says Jason, a small-business owner in New York, who also asked to use only his first name in order to express his true feelings. As a married father of a 6- and a 10-year-old, Jason, who’s 44, says having his life shaped by his kids’ routines has both brought on his midlife crisis and kept him from doing much about it.
“I’ve worked incredibly hard for decades and now have infinite opportunities to travel, participate in exciting things,” he says. “And I’m having to say no over and over again so I can just sit at home and be there for bedtime. And that really kills me. I feel like I am trading away fast-dwindling years doing insignificant things.”
Maximé, the life coach, says the advice she gives clients who feel stuck at midlife is that blowing up their lives isn’t the only way to make a change. She encourages them to think in terms of baby steps. “Start by imagining the perfect way of life you’d want to live,” she says. “Then, figure out the practical steps you can take to get closer to that ideal.”
For a lot of the people I talked to, the most immediate way to ward off feelings of existential angst has been through forging deeper ties with those around them. Jane, the marketing professional in Canada, recently joined a dragon boat racing team and started volunteering at a local dance festival.
She’s embracing the idea of small-scale adventures — at least until a better option presents itself.
J. Lester Feder is a freelance writer living in Brooklyn.
Business Insider’s Discourse stories provide perspectives on the day’s most pressing issues, informed by analysis, reporting, and expertise.
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